Because I Want to Remember

I've been wandering around today, singing In Christ Alone as our church sings it, with On Christ the Solid Rock I Stand as the bridge.

On Christ the solid rock I stand;

All other ground is sinking sand,

All other ground is sinking sand.

Nathan was doing school work at the table and asked me, "what is sinking sand?"  We had a fun conversations about it.  He was concerned that one might stumble upon sinking sand at the beach.  I told him about how fighting to get out of sinking sand makes you more stuck; you need another person to pull you out while you relax.

How perfect is this song as a word picture of a relationship with Christ?

I tried to explain the picture, and the idea of word pictures to him.  Jesus is strong, like a rock.  He is unbreakable, solid.

The things we place our faith in, ourselves, our skills and abilities, our money, people... they are sinking sand.  They look like you should be able to rely on them to safely cross, but they are not infallible.

He asked, "what is faith?"

My heart is in awe at the simple conversations... God, give me the right words, to communicate, to make it simple, to help him understand.

"Faith is believing in that which you cannot see.  Come here," I told him.  "Turn your back to me and put your arms out.  Can you see me?  I want you to fall backward, and I'm going to catch you.  Do you believe that I will catch you?"

A silly grin, a fun game. "Yes".

"So you have faith that I will catch you, because I told you I will."

He fell backward, moved his feet.  "Try again, try not to move your feet."  Again, he moved his feet.  Over and over he fell backward, moving his feet, until finally, he knew that I would catch him.  He put his faith in me.  He stopped stepping backward to catch himself.  He flew backward into my arms, over and over.

We stopped, he giggling, me smiling proudly.  And now, the teaching moment.  Please, Lord, let me get it right.  "Nathan, I have faith in Jesus.  He has promised to be with me, to be there when I fall.  Not with a body like a person, I'm not going to fall over right now, because I would fall on the floor!  But when things are hard.  He's with me, and in me.  He said he would be, and I have faith that he is."

These conversations are hard for Nathan.  This whole idea of Jesus being in his heart.... well, where? Jesus is a person, right?  So I've realized I need to be careful to explain that the Holy Spirit is who lives in us, in our hearts and minds, and the Holy Spirit has no body.

"Is he in me?"

"Have you asked him to be?"

"No."

"Then I guess not."  Oh, that was hard to say.  But I decided some time ago that I will NOT pressure my children to accept Christ.  I will explain and offer, explain and offer, but I will not pressure.

"Why not?"

"Nathan, Jesus is not going to make you accept him.  He wants to live in you, very much, but he won't come in unless you ask.  He won't make you choose him.  It has to be your choice."

The conversation continue a bit; Nathan thinks very deeply, and always wants to know more.  We talked about what makes something a choice, and more about what it means to have a relationship, a friendship with God.  That piqued his interest, I'm not sure I've ever told him that our relationship is a friendship.  Nathan is all about friends!

"Nathan, God will not force you to choose him.  I will not force you to choose him."  And he smiled and skipped on back to the playroom.  It's not time yet.  That's okay.  In this moment, I get to see the stepping stones that will lead to a faith that I think I might envy someday.